I am not a morning person. I wake up sleepily at 5.30am because some people are getting ready to go for a run before 6am morning exercise as it’s scheduled. I always have a hard
time going to bed. The light and the noise are not friendly. They keep me and wake me up easily. Getting 6 hours of sleep makes it hard to focus in
lectures and unable to cope or functioning well most of the time in the morning plus having bread for breakfast and sandwiches for lunch every day, my body says uh-oh. Morning choirs is at 8am-8.30am
then worship and lectures until 12.30pm in order. It’s pretty rough and in rush every morning.
Shall I keep complaining? I hope not.
I don't have a job, got no money, 3 meals are provided. I should be thankful, therefore, I am thankful and I've learned to be content whatever circumstances. (Philippians 4: 11-12)
January 18th, 2012
My classmates and I are keeping each other’s company,
praying for one another. We also give hugs, at least a shoulder for another to
lean on. We walk hand in hand when one can barely walk. I am independent. For
me, 24/7 doing stuff with people around all the time is killing me. I have free time at 3.30-5.30pm which I can spend time with Jesus alone somewhere around the
base. It’s really good to have a quiet time and I found that after spending
time with God at least 2 hours, my mind, my thoughts, my emotions, everything
changes. It’s drifting from whatever to God and the rest of my day went pretty
well since I focused on Him. It should definitely be in the morning before
starting the day. I know. I’m working on it.
We are learning about the nature and character of God this week. We are
here to pursue God, to seek Him, to get to know him more and more, and to make
Him known. Who is God? What does He look like? I should have known Him, right? No,
I don’t. Every day, I discover Him a bit more and I don’t think I fully know
about Him yet. It’s still an ongoing journey. One day, I found the revelation about
being with Him no matter what circumstances, hot or cold weather, rich or poor. I was happy
just to be with Him. The next day, nothing has happened, another day there’s
still nothing. What’s that? One day during the class, our guess speaker brought this up and
he said. “It’s okay, just press on, keep pressing on no matter what.”
January 19th, 2012
Yesterday, I was very tired, exhausted, crumpy, lousy oh
whatever words you can find it fit in. Something has happened when I got to my
work duty at 1.30pm on time. I was told that I was late 10 minutes and I should
be there at 1.20pm. Should I be informed in advance, shouldn’t I? She prayed for me before start working then
left. What the heck! Another revelation here after an hour processing
everything. Fixing my eyes on God. Don’t take anything too personal. They are
human being, just as I am. Something has been changing. It’s shifting like the
light shines on and the darkness is gone. I felt light again, not to carrying
the weight of whatever that just happened. Something was stirring up, I
had to paint and I got my painting named
“Gazing upon God’s beauty”
Today, morning sucks as usual, morning exercise, hurry in
shower, a bunch of people in the kitchen waiting and making breakfast, morning
choirs, sleepy in the lectures, skipped lunch, ran to post office to get children check done for hands on compassion but it didn't work out, the bus came
late, I was late for work duty, very hungry, tired, weather is hot and the sun is super strong.
I sat down and asked God to reveal Himself to me, have mercy on me.
It’s a beautiful day, I would say when I gazed on the beauty of God.
Something has been happening here...